Tan-Line

Picture the most handsome man you have ever imagined – your dream guy. He’s perfect in every way he has decided to come to your place for some fun. You watch him as he undresses. He lowers his pants, and you can see that he has a flawless tan. There is a perfect line across his rippled abs – golden tan above, and pure white below: Only one problem – as his pants drop around his ankles you can’t see much else! His thighs are pure white – a sharp tan-line cuts across them just above the knees. He obviously wears those baggy boardshorts while he’s out in the sun. Sure, they’re OK, but so much of him is un-tanned that his white thighs are blinding you! You can’t see! Wouldn’t it be better if he had a Speedo tan-line. Not only would more of him be a golden brown (and you wouldn’t be blinded), but the little remaining portion of him that is still his natural color would be framing the exact parts of him that prompted you to invited him home in the first place. The Mona Lisa doesn’t just flap on the walls of the Louvre – it’s canvas attached with a magnet live a child’s finger painter to the fridge. No, it hangs in a beautiful frame.

Men, let your features hang in a beautiful frame! Get a Speedo tan line!

(The only thing more sexy than a man who wears a Speedo, is that same man out of his Speedo.)